The Incredible Shrinking Mother

I have officially been a mother now for nearly 4 and a half years. I love my family more than anything in the world. I will even go as far to say they are my world.

But they do not represent all parts of my world.

Let me explain..

Once I became a mother my life revolved around my newborn. I lived, ate, slept (well...not really), and breathed motherhood. Not much else seemed to matter. Quite honestly, I couldn't even tell you what day it was...but I could easily tell you the last time my little one had a bowel movement and exactly how long they slept that day.

And I truly believe that is how it should be at that time.

But it shouldn't be like that forever.

In my years as a Mommy I've seen an epidemic I like to refer to as the Incredible Shrinking Mommy. As women we have goals, dreams, and aspirations. We have hobbies and interests.

And then we get married and start a family.

Priorities are shifted - as they should be - and YOU are no longer a top priority because you have a husband and children you are caring for. I am honored to do that. I love to do that.

But I don't want to lose me in the process.

Once I was a full-time Mommy I realized that I lost a little bit reality. It was harder for me to carry on a conversation that didn't involve something to do with my children. I was not up on current events. I had let any hobbies or dreams I had to be put on hold. My life was my child.

And then it hit me that I wasn't sure I liked that.

As much as I would love it if my little ones would stay tiny - they won't.

Children grow. Life marches on.

I'm so lucky that I have this awesome guy that I am eventually going to grow old with...and I want to still be a vibrant woman full of loves, passions, and interests at that point! I don't want my children to "fly from the nest" and be in a position where I don't know what to do with myself. I basically realized I didn't want to hit 60 and have my only fulfillment in life be that I raised awesome kids. Trust me...that is TOP NOTCH on my priority list, but it's important that I also achieve other goals and dreams. I want to live my life with passion and grow each and every day.

And the mom in me wants my kids to see that and I want them to know that it is important.

And so I did.

I have always loved photography and have taken the steps needed to further my skills. I love blogging and have declared it MINE...I write what I want! I have always wanted to write a children's book and have started jotting down ideas as they form in my head. I have also found that my soul finds painting soothing and calming.

To put it simply, I took simple steps to put ME back on the map.


I see this epidemic happen all the time. And I know that some of you will be reading this and may think that I'm being selfish...but I trust myself and my instincts.

And more than that...I think I've become a better person because of it.

My prayer is that I have a long and beautiful life ahead of me. I have a lot to learn. I have a lot to share. I have a lot of growin' to do.

I hope that when my handsome husband and I are old and gray he is still married to a woman that is passionate about life.

And I hope that my children see me learning, growing, and following my dreams.

And I hope that they see it's important.

And I hope that when they are older they each have a family that they love and care for.

And I hope that family always comes first...but that they also learn to dream with their eyes wide open.

Simple Joy #20

Wow...have I already listed 20 Simple Joys since I started this blog? Doesn't seem possible. Regardless, I think they are fun and I hope you enjoy them too...

My latest?

I love it when I feel like I am being a bad mom and my kids make me feel like I am being the best mom ev-ah!! For example, tonight I planned on making a big dinner (even though it was just the kiddos and I at home) but as it got closer to dinner time and I had two children that didn't seem overly hungry I started to question my plans.

Then I decided I would make a breakfast dinner...but didn't have everything I needed.

Finally I just scratched my head and said, "Hmmmm....how about oatmeal for dinner?"

Bad Mommy. Bad, bad Mommy! I know oatmeal is nutritious, but it's not much of a dinner! Seriously. I'm going to serve my children a bowl of oats for dinner?!!!

Wellllll....I guess for my little ones that apparently ranks right up there with sliced bread. As soon as I suggested it my daughter's face lit up and she excitedly exclaimed, "YES!!! It would be SUCH a special treat!!!!" and then she and Jaden ran to their seats anxiously anticipating their good ol' fashioned Quaker Oats!

Huh!!! Who would have ever thought?!! For all they knew I had planned that...er..."special treat" alll along!

Praying for Baby Stellan....

If you read my blog frequently you know that this Mama believes passionately in the power of prayer. What can happen through prayer continually amazes me and I am humbled by it.

Well, my friends...a fellow blogger needs prayers right now in the most desperate way and I am counting on all of you to pull through for her. I found MckMama's blog because I fell in love with her photography...and in reading about her photography also learned about her son's heart condition. A few weeks ago Stellan seemed to be doing fantastic and living the life of a normal toddler, but just recently took a drastic turn for the worse.

Friends, I will be the very first to admit that reading about a child hurting is difficult for me. I think about it for days. To be perfectly honest, I obsessive over it. I believe part of that is because of our scare with Jaden. I know what it is like to have your mind go where it should never have to go regarding your child. To say it is scary is an understatement.

That is why I am taking time on my blog to reach out to you and ask that you for do for Stellan what so many of you did for Jaden. Pray. It only needs to take a few moments and you can do it where you are sitting right now...just close your eyes, open your heart, and pray that God heals this little boy.

"Every tomorrow has two handles...we can take hold of it by the handle of anxiety or by the handle of faith."

--Author Unknown

Compassion.

Compassion is something that Matt and I have always tried to instill in our children. Compassion for those we love. Compassion for those in need. Compassion for the earth. Compassion for each other.

It's a difficult concept to teach...and we have found that so often the best way to teach it is by modeling it for them. Showing them how to have compassion. But we are not perfect. There are days when compassion is not at the forefront of my mind.

But every so often - if we are lucky - our children will demonstrate for us that which we have worked so hard to instill.

Let me share a story with you....

Eva recently had to go in to have a vaccine administered. Eva was nervous about this and I spoke with her at length about what to expect. I told her exactly what the nurse would do...and yes, I told her that it would hurt but that it would only last a minute and Mommy would be there to help comfort her.

We got to the doctor's office and I sat Jaden in a chair across from us. I sat Eva in my lap and again went through everything with her. The nurse was wonderful and helped me explain.

As the nurse administered the vaccine my little girls face began to wrinkle up and the tears began to flow. I hugged her as tears trickled down her face and told her that it was okay....it was all over. I just sat there holding her.

And then I looked over at my son...

Jaden was sitting quietly in his chair with his hands covering up his face and he was sobbing. When I asked him what was the matter he pointed to Eva and said, "Eye-ah" (his word for Eva). And then began sobbing all over again.

Jaden loves his sister with all of his heart...and could not handle seeing her hurting.

Compassion.

"Compassion brings us to a stop...and for a moment we rise above ourselves."

--Mason Cooley

Our Anniversary

Matt and I celebrated 11 years of marriage this past weekend. ELEVEN YEARS!!! To celebrate we decided to enjoy a beautiful dinner at one of our favorite nice restaurants.

The kind of restaurant that has low lighting, hushed voices, and a menu that makes your mouth water.

The kind of restaurant that gives you a black napkin to match your dress - because heaven forbid I get the white lint off of my white napkin on my black dress.

The kind of restaurant the definitely DOES NOT have a children's menu.

The best part?

Look who we took with us to celebrate our special day...

That's right...our two favorite little people in the whole entire universe!!! This year we decided to celebrate our anniversary as a family.

Eva and Jaden were wonderful and it was fun to see the "wonders" around us through the eyes of a child. Wonders we take for granted. The waterfall in the lobby was enjoyed more than the last time I saw it because this time I saw it through the eyes of a four year old. I never paid the sinks in the bathroom much attention...but Eva did. She ran her fingers delicately over them and talked about how sparkly they were. It's amazing what you notice when a child helps you pay attention.

There was also learning to be done...on both parts. Eva and Jaden learned that in "fancy" restaurants our voices must be lower than in other restaurants. We worked on this before we even left for the restaurant - to the point that when we would bring up going to this particular restaurant Jaden would put his finger over his lips and say, "Shhhhhhh..."

Matt and I had learning to do to....who would have thought that BOTH of our little ones love calamari (squid)?!! They both asked for seconds!


It was a beautiful evening celebrating 11 years of marriage...with some of the people that mean the most to me in the whole wide world. Matt, thank you for being YOU. On our wedding day I never thought I could love you more. But I do. With each passing year my love, admiration, and respect for you grows.

"Our wedding was many years ago. The celebration continues to this day."

--Gene Perret

I'm Expecting...

Yes, I am expecting....a new camera that is. I big, bouncing, beautiful Nikon D60 to be correct. The estimated "due" date is the end of the month...and this Mama can't WAIT!

Date Night

The note on the counter said, "Be ready at 6:15...you and I have dinner reservations."

I am a girl that loves a good surprise and my husband surprised me with a date night...an evening of adult conversation and amazing food at one of our favorite restaurants.

But first I had to get ready.

I love getting ready for an evening out...deciding what to wear...how to do my hair...how I want to play up my make-up. Getting ready for an evening out is part of the fun!

Especially when my special little girl is right by my side to help me out in my preparations.

The first thing Eva told me I needed to do for my date with Daddy was to wear high heels.

She went straight to my closet and after I picked out a dress she picked out the high heels that she thought went best with it. Together we looked at the whole ensemble in the mirror and decided it was perfect!

Next we focused on our fingers and toes. I told her that, as girls, when we have somewhere special to go it's always nice for our fingernails and toenails to look pretty.

We picked out a polish and together we painted our nails. Jaden joined in the fun too...he was feeling left out (and young enough not to know the difference) so we painted his baby toenails to match ours!

The last thing Eva told me I needed for my special date with Daddy was jewelry. Lots of fancy jewelry.

We looked at different pieces and she decided she liked the ring the best. She liked how sparkly it was!

Soooo...after much preparation and help from my little girl I was finally ready for my date...

"You know when you have found your prince because you have a smile not only on your face...but in your heart as well."

--Author Unknown

Simple Joy #19

Nothing is sweeter than enjoying a good meal with friends. After a fun day of swimming our children, along with many of their neighborhood pals, sat together to enjoy a cookout! Of course the adults joined in the fun too...but we didn't look quite as cute as this little group of munchkins did sitting at their picnic table together!

"One of the nicest things about life is that we must regularly stop whatever it is that we are doing and devote our attention to eating."

--Luciano Pavarotti

Organization 101

I am a bit obsessed with organizing. I have trouble thriving when things are cluttered in my life. Even something as simple as the laundry room being messy (as it is right now) leaves me feeling uneasy. I've learned to let some things go since I've had children...their closets and play areas get messy and I've learned to just let it ride until bedtime. I know in the scheme of things it is not important. However, in my own little corner of the world I find a wonderful sense of fulfillment if I can get something completely organized. I thought I would share a few projects with you that I've recently tackled:

As many of you know I take a TON of pictures. I'm not kidding when I say a TON...over 1,000 each year. Keeping these photographs organized has been a sort of stress for years. I know I could store them online, however our family loves to look through photos! I was unable to find a photo album that would hold as many pictures as I wished and I really didn't want a couple photo albums for each year. After searching the web for a solution I came across the website SendaFrame.com A fantastic website that has expandable photo albums. The one I purchased below can expand to hold up to 1,000 pictures - PERFECT! You can also have it engraved so I put our family name on it and the year. I figured I would just purchase one a year and add pictures to it as they are taken. Eva and Jaden LOVE it because they can easily look through it and I feel better that the images are protected so they are not damaged.

I purchased this binder at Target a little over a year ago and I love it. It holds ALL pertinent information in it that might be needed in an emergency. Everything from life insurance policy numbers, to credit card info, to information on our wills. It also has a place to keep track of any and all doctors, dentists, etc. that we use. It's just nice to know that in the event of an emergency (and my prayer is we never need it) all info is easily accessible in one place.

I love trying new recipes and I found that my cabinet with my recipe books was getting completely cluttered with recipes that I had torn out of magazines, copied from friends, etc. I had to find a way to keep it all organized and I surely was NOT going to re-write everything on recipe cards. My solution was to purchase an empty binder and fill it with page protectors.

Then I just slipped in all of my torn out or copied recipes and not only were they organized, but they were protected from getting dirty while I was cooking! I also used subject dividers to organize the recipes according to genre.

The other thing that is beautiful about this is that if I try a new recipe that I don't love I can just pull it out of the sleeve protector and pitch it - so easy!

I hope you find these little tricks helpful! I know that this Happy Housewife loves absolutely anything that makes our day to day life run smoother!

My Challenge: Share some of your own organization tips on your blog for us all to see too!! Let me know when you do so I can be sure to check it out!! I'm always looking for new ideas!

CRAZY.

Want to know what is completely crazy?

I went to Hobby Lobby yesterday and they have their Christmas Stuff out! I'm not just talking a few things....I'm talking aisles and aisles of ornaments, wreaths, trees, paper, and ribbons.

It is July people - JULY!!!!

Want to know what is even more crazy than that?

I fell into their sale campaign hook, line, and sinker! Literally, I said "Christmas Stuff in July??" and immediately after that said, "Ohhhhh.....I love those ornaments!!!!!"

I'm not kidding - I had ornaments in my hand and I was picking out cool ribbon to wrap my Christmas packages in. On top of the mere fact that the Christmas stuff was out it was also on SALE...and this girl looooooves a good sale. I was as happy as an elf picking out my goodies while humming a Christmas tune in my head.

Then it hit me that this is allllll completely ridiculous.

It's July.

It's 85 degrees out.

Christmas is literally half a year away!!!

I sheepishly put all of my loot back and walked out of the store. I was little surprised I fell for the whole thing....well, maybe not surprised...after all, it was on SALE!

On the way out of the parking lot I started thinking that maybe Hobby Lobby had it right after all...I mean if we start celebrating the Holidays so early we can just enjoy them longer!!!

Anyone for hiding Easter Eggs in October?!!!

Our Weekend....in pictures

A trip to a local zoo...

Parade on the Fourth of July...
Snuggling on our back porch with friends to watch area fireworks...

Picnic and hiking in a local park...

Summer Popsicles...

A weekend we didn't want to end...so many special memories and moments!

Baby Feet

My love for photography continues to grow...and every so often I get a picture that I know I'll cherish for years to come. I snapped this shot of Jaden's feet while he was swinging on our swingset. From a technical standpoint I know that there is way too much shadowing in it...but from a Mommy's standpoint I fell in love with it the moment I shot it.

I've always been in love with my kids chubby little baby feet. I love kissing them and playing patty-cake with them. I love how this picture not only shows his chubby little feet, but also the baby hairs on his legs. I love the amazing summer sky we enjoyed that day in the background.

I think my love for photography is rooted in the fact that moments that are sooo precious and sooo priceless can be captured and enjoyed for years to come. This picture - to me - is an awesome example of that.

"A good snapshot stops a moment from running away."

--Eudora Welty